I wonder if maybe I'm lying to myself.
Did I really only want to get fucked up?
Or did I want to die?
I knew the pills wouldn't be enough.
I knew that.
But the pills might have been enough.
And I was aware.
The knives are only ten feet away.
I could drown myself in the bathtub.
Look up how to make a noose online.
All sorts of easy ways to die and none were that far away.
All I needed was a little courage.
To care a little less.
To be a bit more reckless.
Was I lying to myself?
Am I lying to myself?
Do I want to die?
Going to lay here now.
Hurting.
And not say anything.
All out of "courage" now.
This is just a poem right cause i dont think this is very good if it how you really feel i think the poem is good if it just a poem but i hope this isnt how you really feel this is coming from a guy that love dark and gore evil type of poetry. but is worried about you
ReplyDeleteIt's not a poem. It's how I really feel.
Deleteplease dont kill yourself i bet there are alot of people that would miss you alot i know i would miss ya ( even though i dont know you but still )so please ask for help from parents friend or family im sure they would help you with what ever is making you feel this way
DeleteThank you for that<3, but I won't be asking for help. Asking for help from any of them...costs me too much. So, I'll deal with it in my not very good way and eventually I'll be halfway okay again.
Deleteokay and please dont kill yourself i know i said that already but i just have to say that again dont let those thoughts cross your mind. im just worried but i hope you feel better soon
ReplyDelete